Previous Chapter
here
CHAPTER TWO
SOMEONE NEW
[Eskobar - hear from Scala]
oooooooooo
Someone New So is it goodbye?
Is it time to set you free? Is it time to let it fly? Is it time to let it bleed
We used to take turns To cover up the pain
Deep below it burns And the feelin' still remains
You're gonna find someone new I really hope you do 'Cause I love you
And the sun will come on thru, It's gonna shine for you 'Cause I adore you
Yes we gave it a try But maybe for too long
Out of every sorrow
Another day will dawn You're gonna find someone new
I really hope you do
'Cause I love you And the sun will come on thru, It's gonna shine for you
'Cause I adore you And the road travels on
But I'm still near you In my life, like a song I will still hear you
Still ... Sun will shine for you
'Cause I adore you ...
oooooooooo
The next morning I would prefer not even risen. I was miserable. All night these thoughts circled Jacobs Bella Swan and I had, although I was not converted, all noticed in my dreams. I had kissed her, great God! Why do all required of me that I should keep my feelings for Sam in fencing, while Jake is his desire could indulge unabashedly? against first lunch, I managed to torture me out of bed. Actually, I did it only because my Mum tore the curtains and I literally chased. I ate breakfast alone. Mum and Seth had left, without giving me notice. I was more or less care. I knew that they no longer hold out my moods. me that they no longer could stand . I had become a burden. A ball and chain. I made it difficult for them to live their lives in spite of everything on. As much as I would have simply vanished into thin air. No one believed me, not that I so wanted to be. I did not want to be morose, bitter and vengeful. I wanted to hurt anybody, I did not want to cry to sleep, rest would not. But all I did. I could not help it. It was like a compulsion. A kind of distraction. Sometimes I found it by actually easier to endure the pain. For a short time to forget why I was so, as I was, and why I did what I did not do. I was even kicked out of school. Because of their disrespectful behavior towards teachers and classmates. The worst was probably that I could blame no one, to avoid my presence.
The next few hours I remained alone. I washed clothes, did the dishes, cleaned the windows. It was all so dull - as it was before Sam. It seemed to me as was my relationship with Sam, nothing more than a small, nice stop in my otherwise bleak existence.
I wanted to turn on the TV, there was a knock at the back door. At first I thought it was just Jacob's father, since that lately more and more looked after my mother, but no sooner had I opened the door, I would have liked it slammed again. Sam stood in front of me. He had entered, tense and somewhat nervous. "What?" I asked. Actually I wanted to let my voice sound harsh, but I have been so long since been alone with him and now I was exposed to my feelings helpless. I needed that. Much ... "I want to talk to you, Leah, please." "What?" "About everything." "Why?" Asked I again. "I thought it was finally with us, is not it?" I knew that he gave me the spark could see hope in the face and was ashamed.
"However, it is - unfortunately. Leah, I'm so sorry, right? So very sorry! I wanted to do never hurt, really. This is engraved with ... we have no control over, Leah. You do not, I do not, not Emily. No one planned this, but ... it does not make the reverse. Leah, I'm imprinted on Emily. She is the love of my life. "His eyes had a little pleading. Did he ask me about forgiveness? Did he ask me, I fall out easily ...
? If he wanted my blessing? Damn, what was that? Are "you come to me to tell, Sam? The fact that you have never loved me at all and only know what love is, since you know Emily? Did you think I do not see it? Did you think it was about me? I already know all this, Sam. Are you listening? You all told me that again and again, tells me that this is not the character is influenced and everything, but how shall I help it? I can not just say: Hey, so what? Stamp is embossed. I have loved you Sam, loved, honestly. And I still do it. I will not, understand you? But I just can not stop from today to tomorrow with it. And now to hear from you that basically this love was always on my side to help me even more not in the least! "He was still out there forever. I wanted to push the door so that he could not see me cry. It was pathetic. I was myself again just made perfect, and even though I had promised myself to let anyone see how damn painful it all did.
"But Leah," Sam began again and pushed the door open. "What makes you think that I had not loved you? I have always loved you, Leah always. And I love you even now! I had never imagined that both of us are not meant for each other. And then ... the character ... Leah, I hope so that you can let go. I know you believe me can not, can not understand it, but I'll never stop loving you. We can not always determine how our life goes. But please, Leah try it. You'll fall in love go to New, and then the pain is bearable again. Leah attempt it, please try it. "
Sam bowed his head, looking for Words, but he found none. How could they? Everything was said. start new ... oh Sam! I would have begged him most, he should not go. He was to remain with me always with me. When he left, I stayed long stand in the doorway. I was so infinitely incomprehensible how he could tell that he still loved me, and I then left alone. Was the character really so irrevocably? Why? God, why only ...? Sam's visit had me thoroughly confused, so I was pretty aimlessly through La Push. And I got more and more to the city limits and I before I knew it I was standing behind Jacob, who sat on a cliff. As so often. And all because of that Bella, the vampire girl. At least he was currently still a crazy chance. Even Bella was a vampire. And it was not marked. She was not committed irrevocably to that Cullen.
"Jacob, do you think this will take very long?" I asked irritably. He got on my nerves so I went to him also on the nerves. I was sick of all that is accessible only upset because of me. I wanted to be angry too unhappy to love, who could basically nothing for his feelings. "Go easy on, Leah!" It surprised me that he was before Anger is not turned. Perhaps such a small fight had now done quite well, even if I were certainly a loser since gone out. "Listen, you can imagine can not imagine how hard this is for me!" Well, how knew he could. He had the same thing with me and Sam go through
"For you? I think you're the self-centered person in the world, Leah. I would be very reluctant to destroy the dream world where you live - in the sun revolves around you - so who I will not say how much your little problem that interests me. Hau. Ab "Jacob made fun of me, they all made fun of me. "Put yourself in my position simply, yes?" Jacob laughed out loud. Slowly I got really mad at him. "Let the grunts and listen to me!" It was no use. Jacob and I were arguing, until he, of course - how could it be otherwise? - Came to talk to Sam.
"When up the mess so upset, Leah," he said, emphasizing each word deliberately, "what do you know how it is for us, Sam, with your eyes ? Consider For Emily, it's bad enough that they're done with your obsession should be. Since she does not need a bunch of guys who are panting after him. "Ideally I would have yelled at him, loudly and incessantly. This asshole! Instead, I spat at his feet and ran away, after passing through the forest home.
Emily, Emily, Emily ... I would have loved to flee, get away from it all here. I did not hear what the other thought from the pack and I wanted no more that they knew what was going through my head. I should have done it, just like Jake, of a few hours later, just ran it ...
I wanted to turn on the TV, there was a knock at the back door. At first I thought it was just Jacob's father, since that lately more and more looked after my mother, but no sooner had I opened the door, I would have liked it slammed again. Sam stood in front of me. He had entered, tense and somewhat nervous. "What?" I asked. Actually I wanted to let my voice sound harsh, but I have been so long since been alone with him and now I was exposed to my feelings helpless. I needed that. Much ... "I want to talk to you, Leah, please." "What?" "About everything." "Why?" Asked I again. "I thought it was finally with us, is not it?" I knew that he gave me the spark could see hope in the face and was ashamed.
"However, it is - unfortunately. Leah, I'm so sorry, right? So very sorry! I wanted to do never hurt, really. This is engraved with ... we have no control over, Leah. You do not, I do not, not Emily. No one planned this, but ... it does not make the reverse. Leah, I'm imprinted on Emily. She is the love of my life. "His eyes had a little pleading. Did he ask me about forgiveness? Did he ask me, I fall out easily ...
? If he wanted my blessing? Damn, what was that? Are "you come to me to tell, Sam? The fact that you have never loved me at all and only know what love is, since you know Emily? Did you think I do not see it? Did you think it was about me? I already know all this, Sam. Are you listening? You all told me that again and again, tells me that this is not the character is influenced and everything, but how shall I help it? I can not just say: Hey, so what? Stamp is embossed. I have loved you Sam, loved, honestly. And I still do it. I will not, understand you? But I just can not stop from today to tomorrow with it. And now to hear from you that basically this love was always on my side to help me even more not in the least! "He was still out there forever. I wanted to push the door so that he could not see me cry. It was pathetic. I was myself again just made perfect, and even though I had promised myself to let anyone see how damn painful it all did.
"But Leah," Sam began again and pushed the door open. "What makes you think that I had not loved you? I have always loved you, Leah always. And I love you even now! I had never imagined that both of us are not meant for each other. And then ... the character ... Leah, I hope so that you can let go. I know you believe me can not, can not understand it, but I'll never stop loving you. We can not always determine how our life goes. But please, Leah try it. You'll fall in love go to New, and then the pain is bearable again. Leah attempt it, please try it. "
Sam bowed his head, looking for Words, but he found none. How could they? Everything was said. start new ... oh Sam! I would have begged him most, he should not go. He was to remain with me always with me. When he left, I stayed long stand in the doorway. I was so infinitely incomprehensible how he could tell that he still loved me, and I then left alone. Was the character really so irrevocably? Why? God, why only ...? Sam's visit had me thoroughly confused, so I was pretty aimlessly through La Push. And I got more and more to the city limits and I before I knew it I was standing behind Jacob, who sat on a cliff. As so often. And all because of that Bella, the vampire girl. At least he was currently still a crazy chance. Even Bella was a vampire. And it was not marked. She was not committed irrevocably to that Cullen.
"Jacob, do you think this will take very long?" I asked irritably. He got on my nerves so I went to him also on the nerves. I was sick of all that is accessible only upset because of me. I wanted to be angry too unhappy to love, who could basically nothing for his feelings. "Go easy on, Leah!" It surprised me that he was before Anger is not turned. Perhaps such a small fight had now done quite well, even if I were certainly a loser since gone out. "Listen, you can imagine can not imagine how hard this is for me!" Well, how knew he could. He had the same thing with me and Sam go through
"For you? I think you're the self-centered person in the world, Leah. I would be very reluctant to destroy the dream world where you live - in the sun revolves around you - so who I will not say how much your little problem that interests me. Hau. Ab "Jacob made fun of me, they all made fun of me. "Put yourself in my position simply, yes?" Jacob laughed out loud. Slowly I got really mad at him. "Let the grunts and listen to me!" It was no use. Jacob and I were arguing, until he, of course - how could it be otherwise? - Came to talk to Sam.
"When up the mess so upset, Leah," he said, emphasizing each word deliberately, "what do you know how it is for us, Sam, with your eyes ? Consider For Emily, it's bad enough that they're done with your obsession should be. Since she does not need a bunch of guys who are panting after him. "Ideally I would have yelled at him, loudly and incessantly. This asshole! Instead, I spat at his feet and ran away, after passing through the forest home.
Emily, Emily, Emily ... I would have loved to flee, get away from it all here. I did not hear what the other thought from the pack and I wanted no more that they knew what was going through my head. I should have done it, just like Jake, of a few hours later, just ran it ...
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